When will I ever learn?

Everytime, I mean everytime without fail, when I cook something in the oven, like a pork loin roast or a meatloaf birthday cake, I open the oven door and get suckered punched in the face with 350 degrees of unleashed hell and heat fury.

My glasses get fogged up, I feel like my face is being stung by a thousand sweat bees and I yelp out a wordy durd.

All without dropping the pan on my feet. (That would be awful...)



At least I'm not like Jamie in Deadpan Valentine where he failed to commit suicide by placing his head-in-the-oven because of the unpaid-gas account cut-off.

I must prefer the electric stove way of instant punch in the face.